Adult Children of Parental Alienation Syndrome: Breaking the Ties That Bind (Norton Professional Book)
By:
Amy J. L. Baker
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Average Customer Rating: 5.0 out of 5
Description: An examination of adults who have been manipulated by divorcing parents.Parental Alienation Syndrome (PAS) occurs when divorcing parents use children as pawns, trying to turn the child against the other parent. This book examines the impact of PAS on adults and offers strategies and hope for dealing with the long-term effects. .
Publisher: W. W. Norton & Company
Customer Review: 4 out of 5 Estrangement - I found the examples in this book most helpful as I'm a mother who was a victim of PAS by my ex-husband and this estrangement has followed me through the years. The pain it has brought me has lasted 30 years. I am still not very close to my grown children due to this influence. I know divorce was to blame but what is one to do when their life is in jeopardy? I have found great help in a group. Search for: Moms of Estranged Adult Children.
We need more sunshine on this subject matter.
Customer Review: 5 out of 5 Every judge and evaluator should read this book, do what the children say and stop trafficking children to generate money - Reading the QUOTES from the children is heart wrenching. Amazing. This is the first book that I've seen that quotes numerous stories from children who were alienated by a parent and grandparents against the other parent.
Many thousands of children are trafficked into alienation by judge and evaluator actions every year because normally the judges instantly give the mothers 83% of the parenting time which greatly aids the brainwashing of the children. Just the action of judges turning most fathers instantly into 17% visitors breeds unbelievable alienation. The children are indoctrinated into mother cults before the courts get evidence from the father - evidence which divorce industry people often say they don't have time to review. Once in a while a father is the alienator. The sole custody environment is a perfect breeding ground for custodians to alienate. This BOOK describes the "cult" influence.
Judges and custody evaluators and court therapists have thousands of facts to realize from THIS BOOK. But their lawyer friends and state treasuries are benefiting tens of Billions of dollars every year by judges trafficking children into sole custody. If only the court people would allow what the children very strongly wanted and complained about in THIS BOOK - for the alienated parent to tell children what is going on. Please read the real BEST INTEREST of the children from the alienated childrens' own MOUTHS. ;_; Judges and court-reliant psychologists threaten fathers to keep their children in the dark and never tell them, or fathers might lose what little time they have with their children. My judge blocked the strategies mentioned in THIS BOOK which would benefit parenting exchanges - strategies that I motioned for repeatedly even before reading the book. But lawyers (judges) have oaths to be nice to other lawyers (including the custodian's father). Well, alienated fathers, for years "I took the high road"(Please read THIS BOOK) with the court gag in my mouth. My family and I didn't explain to my kids what was going on because we couldn't tell negative things about the mother and her parents. After 1.5 years of alienation by the custodian family which was multiplied by the judge, the first court family therapist and even the custodian family's former minister wrote pages to the judge about what was really going on and the severe consequences of alienation - but the immovable judge rejected them. And the child trafficking industry made unbelievable amounts of money for years.
The children in this book wanted to know what was going on right away. Alienated fathers, please talk to a minister(and maybe a stable Christian psychologist who doesn't rely on the activist court), show the minister what the children said in THIS BOOK and tell your kids now (hopefully with the minister) because you are most likely going to lose the wonderful relationship you had with your kids before the court instantly turned you into a visitor to generate Billions. Tell your children right away before they become hardened cult members. THIS BOOK tells you how it happens. And sole custody builds the environment for sole custodian cults to control children's minds very quickly. It happens in thousands of court cases.
Please READ the CHILDREN'S STORIES in the book. Give your children examples of the history of alienation by the alienator's family. Often times there is decades of evidence. The children in this book wanted to know because they were ABUSED for years by brainwashing and they didn't know reality. Fathers finally give up and go broke trying to plead with the courts to help. Read THIS BOOK and find out HOW the children found out and how LONG it took.
Then please tell Congress to cut back the annual $10+ Billion dollar Federal Support funding for states where judges and court-reliant psychologists increase Federal matching funds by restricting access to most fathers to increase support amounts (CLASP).
Customer Review: 5 out of 5 Will change your Life - I purchased this book hoping to shed some light upon the situation regarding my husband & his children. Not only did it enlighten me with his situation, but my own from childhood. This book has changed my life, making me see everything in a different & clearer way. This is the foremost book on the subject & should not be overlooked. Crying while reading is not always a bad thing - it exposes buried feelings.
Customer Review: 5 out of 5 This book reveals PAS for what it is--Emotional Abuse. The adult perspective shows the final outcome of PAS left untreated - The Adult Children of Parental Alienation Syndrome, Breaking the Ties that Bind, is a thought provoking series of interviews. After reading the book, one can no longer deny the existence of parental alienation. It also becomes futile to question the claims of PAS as a "credible disorder". The interviewees shed light on the disturbing outcome of Parental Alienation when it is left untreated. Amy Baker's research reveals the ramifications of a disorder that leads to devastation, despair, and desertion. Due to venomous words by the alienating parent, the adult children look back on their lives with sorrow. They are distraught by their actions and their words, to a parent that did not deserve such hatred. The regrets for most will last a lifetime.
Sorrowfully, one interviewee recalled, "I tortured her so much when I was there for the three days that she could not handle it" (p.243). This excerpt shows how the actions of children that are enmeshed with an alienating parent are not a depiction of optimal mental health. While many children have adjustment difficulties post divorce, most do not "torture a parent for three days." Indeed this book exemplifies Breaking the Ties that Bind; the ties are an enmeshment between a child and a parent, the alienating parent. As noted by Baker, "When children feel that their parents are more like friends than parents, it may indicate that the alienating parent is sharing too much personal information with the child, is relying on the child for support and comfort, and may not be setting appropriate limits" (p.244). Most would agree that adult conversations are not meant for innocent ears, and will lead to poor mental health.
This book is not only educational, but it also offers a unique perspective due to the adults' looking back over a life of regret. In addition, the book shows the long-term results of parental alienation syndrome. After reading the book, debates over terminology are useless. One will realize the magnitude of parental alienation and recognize it for the problem that it is. Many of the interviews cannot see forward for looking behind. They are bewildered and perplexed at how their innocent minds were unjustly poisoned. They suffer from guilt and sleepless nights. While some relationships are troubled, others are permanently severed. This book provides an understanding to this disorder for both the every day reader and professional.
Customer Review: 5 out of 5 A fine addition to the literature on PA - A collection of stories from adults who experienced parental alienation with analysis and synthesis of the patterns. As a 'targeted' parent of an 11 y/o daughter who I haven't been able to hug in over a year and a half, I learned from the survivors quite a bit about what my daughter is going through and what she would want me to do, if she could tell me.
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